No one is perfect; we all encounter anger in our lives and, dealing with anger is a normal part of life. What’s challenging about anger is how we choose to deal with it.
If you choose to be negative and consistently get upset when things don’t go your way you might need to take a serious look at constructive ways to control your anger and keep your temper in check. If on the other hand you choose to deal with the upsetting issue in a positive manner means you’re able to stay in control in spite of whatever frustration you’re experiencing. Uncontrolled anger will eventually take a toll on your own health, your family and your relationships. Often times it does not end well.
Take an objective look at yourself, come to terms with your anger issue and start implementing positive changes to improve your own health and your family relationships. Learn to control your anger, change and live.
Here are 10 Tips:
- Think before you speak
You cannot take back the spoken word so take a few moments to gather your thoughts before saying anything. If you can’t say something good don’t say anything at all. Be respectful of others involved and allow them the opportunity to do the same.
- Talk about what made you angry when you are calm
When you calm down and have gathered your thoughts express your frustration in a non-confrontational, assertive way. Clearly state your concerns and what you would like without hurting others or trying to control them.
- Exercise regularly
Physical activities help to reduce stress. Since stress is a major cause of anger you can manage stress by keeping physically active. Go for a brisk walk or run, ride your bike through a nature trail, spend time doing other enjoyable physical activities. Yoga, pilates, Tai Chi are great ways to calm your mind.
- Take a Tmeout
Taking short breaks from your routine can be helpful. Enjoy a few minutes of quiet time in meditation. This might help you feel calm and better prepared to handle whatever comes your way.
- Find and implement possible solutions
Invest time and work on resolving the issue(s) at hand in a positive manner. To every problem there’s a solution. If what you’re doing isn’t working, change it to something that works. If your child’s messy room drive you crazy, you can close the door. If your scheduled dinner time no longer works for everyone, then change it to a time convenient to all. Be flexible and roll with the punches. Anger does not fix anything, it only make matters worse. Flexibility encourages change. Since change is the only constant in our lives we need to change as life changes.
6. Use ‘I’ statements
When dealing with an issue the last thing you want to happen is to create additional tension or place blame. Be respectful and specific. Here’s an example of how you use the “I” statement. Say: “I’m upset that you got up and left the table without offering to help with the dishes,” instead of saying: “You never do any housework.”
7. Be done with grudges
Practice forgiveness. When you forgive you free yourself from carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. Forgiveness is a powerful tool that liberates you to freedom. It is easier to forgive than to hold onto any form of negativity. Embrace the gift of life, forgive yourself and everyone, live in the moment and appreciate the wonderful gift of life.
8. Laugh to release tension
One of the easiest and quickest ways to feel better is to enjoy a good belly laugh. Learn to loosen up, learn to relax and find humour in your given scenario rather than focus on anger. Laughter is natural therapy that does a world of good with no associated costs.
9. Choose to relax
When you feel the urge to be angry, count from one to ten and practice deep-breathing exercises. Go out for a walk in the fresh air, clear your mind and relax. You might also listen to easy, calming music, write in a journal or do a few yoga poses. Best of all take a vacation. Do whatever it takes to encourage relaxation, just do not get angry.