Tag Archives: balance

Can’t Communicate What To Do?

balance-the-body-and-the-soulThe very first thing to do is to take an honest look at yourself and make sure that you are open to learning. If you find that you are angry, you are blaming, you’re defensive, stressed or closed, or that you have an agenda, you will need to calm down and shift your intent from controlling to learning, or you may decide that this is not a good time for you to talk.  Say something like, “I’m feeling too frustrated right now to talk about this. How about we try again in half an hour?” Now disengage, focus on doing some inner work to get open and caring and to go back and try again.

become-a-better-personAs you check in and are open, the next thing to do might seem simple, however, it can be incredibly challenging for most of us. You need to fully accept (100%) that if you are stuck in communicating, the other person is not open and that there is nothing you can do about it.  We have no control over whether another person chooses to be open, closed, caring, uncaring, controlling or accepting.

Having accepted (100%) your lack of control over the other person’s intention, and 100% accepted that you cannot resolve anything when one person is closed, you’ve done all that you can control to encourage communication and, can now take loving action on your own behalf.

fix-problemsYou now take a healthy action and say something like, “We seem to be stuck in our communication right now. Let’s try it again in half an hour.”  Take note that you are not accusing the other person of being closed, which would be a form of control. You are merely stating that you are stuck.

The challenge now is to keep an open heart so that when the other person is open, you too are also open. This means that you walk away with love rather than anger.

However, if the other person never opens up, you need to accept that there is no way of resolving anything with that person. There’s an old proverb which states:  you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink.  The definition of this old proverb is: you can give someone an opportunity but you can’t force that person to take that opportunity.

self-care

 

 

You’ve made a noble effort to resolve a communication issue that is still unresolved.  You now need to be open to learning how to take care of yourself in the face of that truth.

 

 

Are you get stuck with someone and can’t communicate?  What do you usually do?

Do you:

  • angry-person-yellingShout angrily to intimidate the other person into hearing you and/or agreeing with you?
  • Walk away or hang up the phone?
  • Talk louder and faster trying harder to get your point across?
  • Cry in frustration?
  • Give in and just listen quietly to the other person?
  • Withdraw your love in the hope of punishing the other person into hearing you?
  • Reach for a drink or food to avoid your feelings?

What happens with you emotionally with your relationship when you do any of these things?

uncomfortable-conversationWhat happens is that you and the other person become distant for a while until things calm down, but it may be some time before you and that other person (e.g. a friend, child, parent, co-worker, partner) feel comfortable talking with each other or being around each other again.

Is there a better way to approach the situation when you can’t communicate?

definition-of-communication-smallYou bet there is!  First, it is important to understand why you can’t communicate.  You dig deep; investigate and find the root cause, then work to fix it.

When two or more people are open to learning about themselves and each other good communication and conflict resolution flow naturally.  This means that it is more important to you to learn from the situation than it is to be right.

an-open-mind

 

It is impossible to communicate effectively when one person is not open to learning. What eventually happens is that the person that keeps on trying and trying becomes more and more frustrated since there is no way the person that is not open to learning will ever hear or understand why he/she is closed to learning.

Fall Prevention Simple Tips To Prevent Falls

You are at risk of serious injury when you fall.  Falls are a leading cause of injury among older people.

fall preventionAs you get older, physical changes and health conditions can sometimes cause additional reasons for fear of falling.  Consider putting in place a plan to address and deal with fear of falling.  Try to avoid falling.

1. Make an appointment to visit your doctor

Put your fall-prevention plan in place by making an appointment to see your doctor. It could be a time for review and modification of your medications, so prepare to answer the following.

  • write it downRemember what medications you are taking – Make a list of your prescription and over-the counter medications and supplements, or bring them with you to the appointment. Your doctor can review your medications for side effects and interactions that may increase your risk of falling. To help with fall prevention, your doctor may consider weaning you off certain medications for example sedatives and some types of antidepressants.
  • If you fell before do you remember the details? Write down the details, including when, where and how you fell. Be prepared to discuss instances when you almost fell but were caught by someone or managed to grab hold of something just in time. Details such as these may help your doctor identify specific fall-prevention strategies.
  • What was the cause of your fall? ]Certain eye and ear disorders may increase your risk of falls. Be prepared to discuss your health conditions and how comfortable you are when you walk — for example, do you feel any dizziness, joint pain, numbness or shortness of breath when you walk? Your doctor may evaluate your muscle strength, balance and walking style (gait) as well.

2. Keep on moving

stay activePhysical activity helps to sustain muscle strength that go a long way toward fall prevention. Ask your doctor if it’s safe for you to practise activities such as walking, water exercises or tai chi.   Such activities reduce the risk of falls by improving strength, balance, coordination and flexibility.

In case you avoid physical activity because you’re afraid of falling you should let your doctor know so he/she can recommend carefully monitored exercise programs or refer you to a physical therapist. The physical therapist can create a custom exercise program aimed at improving your balance, flexibility, muscle strength and gait.

3. Wear sensible walking shoes

Include comfortable walking footwear as part of your fall-prevention plan.  Sturdy shoes with non-skid soles provide a better grip on surfaces whether in or out.